Single and Ready to Awkwardly Mingle

Locks.  Keys.  Men.

Okay, maybe that’s too provocative an opening.  My friend Neal is going to think I’m talking about Fifty Shades of Grey again, which, by the way, I haven’t read except for the reviews.  And the reviews are hilarious.  I’m guessing they were better written than the book.

No, I’m talking about attending my first ever singles mixer last night with a group of my best girlfriends.  Even though I’m an introvert and prefer hanging out with a few friends as opposed to going to parties, I didn’t feel nervous once I made the decision to go.  I think it was all those years of being the girlfriend of a musician – I was forever going to parties, hostessing parties, and going to bars to listen to music.  I would be forced to talk to all sorts of strangers and then I would collapse at home, my capacity at being social filled to the brim.

At first, the mixer reminded me of junior high dances, where everyone sat along the wall glancing nervously at each other, puberty wreaking havoc on everyone’s self-esteem.  Replace puberty with fully developed hormones, and you have the mixer.  Girls in skimpy dresses getting the most attention?  Even if they looked like Mickey Rourke (post-surgery) in drag?  Ah, just like junior high..not to mention high school, college…you get the idea.

The lock and key aspect of the event was supposed to be an icebreaker or a “game” as one of the organizer’s called it.  If the guy’s key unlocked your lock, both of you were supposed to turn them in, get a new set, and also receive raffle tickets.  Some guys were so focused on the tickets that they didn’t even bother to say anything as they gestured to try their keys.  And then they would simply walk away if it didn’t open the lock.  At one point, I offered to turn both in so that one guy could continue talking to my friend.  As I was walking away, he shouted after me, “Don’t forget my raffle ticket!”  I’m long past taking things personally, so these kinds of exchanges just make me think, hm, interesting.  But I’m taking notes.

I wouldn’t say it’s the most organic way of meeting your special someone – if that’s what you’re looking for – what with all the cheesy randomness of whose key was going to unlock your lock, but I thought it was good practice for just being open to new experiences and interacting with all kinds of people.

I’m in no hurry to find someone, especially starting anything serious, but I realized that I’m open to slowly begin dating again.  Maybe a more natural environment is the best call for me.  I’m thinking of joining a running club after I move out of L.A.  I noticed that I tend to write mostly about running and men/relationships, but not in the same post.  Maybe it’s time to change that.


7 thoughts on “Single and Ready to Awkwardly Mingle

  1. hmm, it made me feel good that i least went out and tried but it also made me sad because it made me think it’s hard out there.


  2. Yeah…but I think the more you get out there, the more people you meet, and they might know someone, etc. Like widening your network! I think the key is to just be your fabulous self and oh yes, use your eyes to their best advantage. People would kill for eyes like yours!


  3. …yeah, better to join some social group that shares an interest with you, ’cause otherwise you’ll run into loads of guys who’ll focus on the stupidest things (like the lock/key/raffle thingie)…


  4. …since you already know who you are (and you’re comfortable with yourself), what you like (and you’re confident in your tastes), and won’t put up with stupidity (essentially, you prefer the sane to the insane), i’d say you already have all the necessary tools for successfully dealing with the wildlife in the dating jungle…


  5. So I just have to hunt down the right animal and go in for the kill? Speaking of, I had steak for dinner tonight. What are we talking about??


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