Couples fascinate me. If it weren’t for the possibility of life behind bars, I would make it my mission to capture, tag, and study them as they moved about in the wild.
How did you meet? Was there an immediate attraction? How did you ask him/her out? Wait!! Where are you going? Tell me your special tale of love!!! Remember, you’re tagged – I will always find you!!!
When it comes to love, I don’t think logic and science have anything to do with it. Have you noticed the variety of couples out there?? What you see in each other simultaneously baffles and delights me. If you have luck, timing, and mutual juju, the two of you are off and running into the sunset. Or the car wash. Maybe a Star Trek the Next Generation convention. Listen, I don’t presume to know what you like to do. It’s all good. It’s about togetherness, right?
I haven’t come across mutual juju in a long time. I’m not sure why. I’m relatively normal (don’t read my About page) and…well, that’s all I got. Oh, I’m not high drama (don’t read my other posts) and I get easily lost, which means I won’t crowd you. Because I’m lost. And I have no idea when I’ll return, so stop asking. Geez!! Get off my back!! Leave me alone!!!!
See? Plenty of space.
Anyways, my history of attraction has always been off-kilter:
I’m attracted to them > They don’t know I exist
I want to run away < They are attracted to me
I’m attracted (but he’s wrong for me) <> They’re attracted (but I’m wrong for him)
My future is a mystery. I don’t know if there will be several people over time or just one. I don’t know if I will ever meet them. Perhaps they exist but our paths may never cross. However, if our paths do cross, I’m sure I’ll recognize them. Until then (or never), I will go my merry way.
And while I was on my aforementioned merry way, I happened to speak to someone whom I failed miserably at recognizing. Not only did he feel familiar, he was kind, funny and warm. No warning bells went off like they usually do. We connected in a very easy way, had a lovely conversation, and then we went our separate ways.
It wasn’t until later that I thought: Oh…that’s the type of guy I should date! If he had asked me out, I would have said yes without hesitation. Not that he would have (see history of attraction above). I honestly don’t know much about anything anymore.
I had preconceived notions about attraction: !sparks! *fluttering* Mr. Darcy walking across a dewy field of grass at sunrise with the intention of proclaiming his love for me. While I was keeping my eye out for all of that, I didn’t see what was in front of me.
That’s either Mr. Darcy or someone coming to kill me. Well, let’s let him come a little closer before jumping to any totally logical conclusions.
That guy gave me a gift. He showed me that connection can float in with an easy grace that is so organic, you don’t know anything is happening. It’s synergy in motion: click click with that person, click click click click with another person. If you’re lucky, your inner self aligns with another’s inner self with more clicks that you’ve ever experienced before. You get them and they get you. It’s real and heartfelt as opposed to thrilling, yet fleeting. Thrilling and fleeting are overrated. I’d rather have the fullness of the real thing.
So I’m on my merry way again: schooled once more, with Darcy on the shelf, and my heart click clacking as I go. With it being Valentine’s Day, I wouldn’t have it any other way.
jane in training 
Loved this post. I have been fascinated with love for as long as I can remember. I remember writing an essay in high school on the subject; determined to find out what exact formula makes lasting love. I’m still always learning! I think love is one of life’s great mysteries.
I love asking the range of relationshippy questions and I could chat about the topic for hours.
I am still the hopeless romantic I always was but I’ve also learned to love myself first and foremost. There’s no sense in putting someone first who can’t really be bothered with you, and simply staying no matter the cost, I’ve learned the hard way, is not the secret to lasting love.
I got really lucky to find someone who is so good to me, and who genuinely loves me back. I’m not religious but I do feel that someone or something brought him into my life. I prayed really hard for months for whoever is listening to keep my future love safe and to bring them to me when we were both ready (but like… could you maybe hurry it up a bit? Let me skip the line a little?). I think when you really want something, there’s something in praying. I hope we will always be this in love, but I know too that life is unpredictable and I have to be okay no matter what happens. I’m just enjoying every wonderful second and hoping for the best.
I’ve also found that mutual interests aren’t the be all end all in love. My love and I are actually quite different, but we really care about one another, and we make sure to show it often, and we take an interest in the others’ interests. After mutual attraction I think it’s about being kind to one another, being understanding and making sure the other always feels loved. But in five years time I might have a totally different theory lol.
There are so many things to enjoy in life, and I’m glad you are cherishing everyday. The best Valentines I ever had was spent with my best girlfriends :). Wishing you lots of happiness in your future! Happy Valentines Day!
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I totally agree that love is mysterious. I will probably ponder the subject forever. Like you said, it is ever-changing and we are ever-learning.
I laughed out loud when you wrote: “could you maybe hurry it up a bit?” That’s totally me. It can’t hurt to ask, right?
I’ve said this before, but I’m genuinely happy for you and where you’re at right now. It’s very exciting! I hope you have a beautiful long- and close-distance Valentines with the ones you love!
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Great post, Jane.
I liked the photos you included…and on the shadowy one with a killer or Mr. Darcy…I thought, oh thank goodness she got away in time!
Ohhh yes, it is so fascinating the variety of couples out there, oscillating.
And some people are VERY brave with the plaid w/ plaid. If my younger sister saw that, I’m pretty sure she would make him go back and change to less “matchy matchy”, or maybe she would see how in love they are and not bother (and I’m only posting this here because I know she reads your blog now too, and gets as much enjoyment from your writing as I do).
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You’re so nice to call him “brave” for wearing plaid on plaid. I have another name for it, but I will be kind and not say it. I wish she was wearing plaid, too. It would show her devotion to her man. hahahaahahahahah!!!! Sorry, couldn’t help it.
Oh…your sister has gone to my blog, too? Yay! Hi Sis!!! I hear that you are the smartest one!! (I’m good at kissing up. You, Jane, of course, are the most beautiful. Don’t listen to your mom. And you’re also brilliant. See? I’m good at this.)
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Yes, you have another fan from the family (she must like people named Jane, too!) You make us LAUGH out loud, and that is a wonderful thing.
You ARE good at kissing up…, hahaha. I have two sisters who are both beautiful in my eyes, but how did you know she was the smartest one? She is beautiful AND smart (I’m kissing up too, since she reads this).
Where was that post I commented on “my daughters are so ugly”….I can’t find it and you don’t have a search box on your blog (activate through JetPack)?
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I took your advice and placed a search box on my site. Thanks! Here’s the post with the “ugly” comment: https://janeintraining.com/2013/07/30/love-on-the-pretzel-train/
Your younger sister is the smartest one? Then maybe she shouldn’t read what I write. I’ve been known to ruin peoples’ IQs.
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Here’s to being merry again. You never know what lurks around the corner when you are on your merry way.
P.S. that’s a lot of plaid for one outfit.
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I felt a little sneaky taking their photo, but really – I couldn’t NOT take it!
Merrily along…
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